Those pictures you see are my Grandparents from BOTH sides of my family. Unfortunately, my maternal grandparents are both deceased.(top) They were literally together until death did they part, 55 years. God still has my paternal grandparents here with us to enjoy.(bottom) They have been together for over 50 years also.
I am so proud and grateful to have had such wonderful examples of what it looks like to have true love. The love that Paul talks about in the Bible, the book of I Corinthians.
Both sets of my grandparents set the foundation, the blueprint for what sickness and health, rich or poor, fat or skinny (lol), happy or sad means in a relationship.
Nowadays some people can’t even fathom the thought of being with someone that long. I believe reason being is because we have totally lost the examples. Our families are broken. The media also gives such terrible “ideas” through television, music, films, etc. Being a babymomma or babydaddy is just the norm. Men continue to be glorified for being with many different women. And the women don’t care because if all they can get is a PIECE of a man they are happy.
I see young parents argue and fight in front of children. Instead of sitting down and actually spending time with the child, they just put a IPAD or Video Game in front of them. My Grandfather used to read to me. I literally used to sit in his lap and he read my favorite stories to me.
Both sets of my Grandparents were considered upper class black couples. They all had professional jobs and were very active within their churches and communities. During my preteens and teens, I actually lived with my maternal grandparents who were both teachers and worked for the State Of Missouri.
Even though they both worked, my Grandfather came home from work every single night to a home cooked meal and a clean, organized house. My Grandmother never had to worry about fixing anything around the house, taking out the trash, mowing the lawn, lifting anything, etc. My Grandfather did all of that. They both “played” their roles and it worked. I hardly ever saw them argue. Whenever they did have a disagreement, they always went into their bedroom or for a drive. We never heard yelling or cussing or anything like that. Attending church was mandatory, no exceptions. And I didn’t have to want for anything as long as I kept my grades up and respected their rules.
Whenever we talked about relationships and marriage, they used to say, “When you’re with someone for so long, you fall in and out of love with each other all the time. But just because you might not get along sometimes, that’s no reason to leave or give up. You have to be friends. And as long as both of you know God for yourself, even if you can’t go to your mate, you can always go to God and ask God to speak to your mates heart for you.”
I have never forgotten that. That will stick with me forever.
Me and my homegirl are always talking about love and relationships. She asked me, “Do you really believe in true love? In this day and age, do you think it’s still out there?”
I told her, “Of course I do!” If God is still God, true love is still attainable with someone.
BUT, here is the kicker…
IT ALL STARTS WITH YOU. YOU have to be your OWN true love before God will present you with that reflection.
Most people don’t want to hear that. They think that nothing is wrong with them. We automatically blame the next person.
But what about if it’s something that you haven’t learned yet. Maybe you need to grow a little bit more and learn a little more lessons before you’re ready for that. You might THINK you’re ready but in fact you just might not be.
You can’t ask for what YOU can’t give. Have you really taken time out to do some work on yourself instead of thinking it’s something beyond you?
In my own life, since doing the self work I look at every person I meet as a teacher. Especially those that I build relationships with. I always ask myself now, “Okay God, what do I need to learn from this person? What do I need to learn from this connection?”
I want to be the BEST self I can possibly be for myself FIRST.
So I say all of this to say, unconditional true love does exist. It existed then and it exists now. God is love and He is infinite. Think about it.
I hold on to the examples I had in my Grandparents. I’ve seen it with my own eyes. I KNOW it exists.